Creative Sentencing

The murder of one of the few U.S. doctors who performed late-term abortions was "a gutless act of terror" and was as destructive as "an earthquake" for women seeking such medical services, the doctor's friend and attorney said Thursday. Attorney Lee Thompson asked District Judge Warren Wilbert to give the harshest possible sentence to anti-abortion zealot Scott Roeder, who admitted he gunned down Tiller in the back of Tiller's Wichita church last May because he felt doing so would protect unborn children. Roeder was facing a mandatory life prison term, although Wilbert had to decide whether to make him eligible for parole after 25 or 50 years. The 52-year-old Kansas City, Mo., resident was expected to be the last person to speak at the hearing and was expected to discuss his beliefs.

Let me tell ya what I think oughtta be done to Scott Roeder. First, he should be forced to undergo a sex change operation. Second, he should have an eight-pound bag of silicone sewn into his body, and after nine months, he would have to pass it through his surgically-created vagina. I guess we might give him six months to recover before we had him go through it again. And so on. That would be about right.